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-- I could?totally get a girlfriend?if I actually tried.
-- Shut up!
只要我認(rèn)真去,我一定能把到妹。閉嘴

Thousands of people are building relationships online at our site. What are you doing? You're probably just looking like a loser?sitting on a couch?with like a strap sweatshirt and some stupid hippy haircut.
很多很多人在我們的網(wǎng)站上找到另一半。你呢,在做什么?或許你就像個笨蛋一樣坐在沙發(fā)上,穿著條紋汗衫,頭上有個難看的發(fā)型。

-- Five, six, seven, eight.
五、六、七、八...

-- Hey, Anthony, can you help me with...Are you practicing for Circus De Olay again?
嘿,Anthony,你可以幫我一下嗎?你又在練太陽馬戲團(tuán)的舞嗎?

-- No...? What do you want?
才不是!你想怎么?

-- Can you...Help me get a girlfriend?
你可以...幫我找女朋友嗎?

-- All you gotta do is act like a jerk, girls eat that crap up like strawberry cheese cake. Like this hottie tottie over here. Watch and learn!
你只要演得像個笨蛋就行。女孩最愛這套,就像愛草莓起司蛋糕一樣愛。看那邊的正妹!看著學(xué)吧!

Rule #1: Act like a jerk.
守則1:演笨蛋

-- Hey, Can I see your water bottle?
嘿,我可以看一下你的水杯嗎?

-- Em...sure.
呃...好啊。

What are you...?
你在干...

-- So you wanna make out?
你想跟我親熱嗎?

-- You sure you all right?
你確定你沒事嗎?

Lesson learned, don't be a jerk.上了一課,就是不要當(dāng)笨蛋。

-- I'm fine! Okey? Now watch me impress some ladies with my manliness. Come on.
我沒事好嗎?,F(xiàn)在看我怎么樣用男子氣概去吸引女生吧。來吧

Rule #2: Show your manliness.
守則2:展現(xiàn)男性魅力

-- I can feel the burn. Hey.
我感覺像在燃燒。嘿!

-- Ew! You should really use some Stainguard deodorant or something! Those yellow?stains are disgusting.
拜托你用點體香劑什么的!那些黃色的污漬惡心死了。

Lesson learned, girls hate yellow.
上了一課,就是女生都討厭黃色。

-- So, er, no luck with her either?
所以說,你運氣也很背嘛。

-- Whatever! Okey? she gave me some stains deodorant though, look, no more yellow stains and smell my pits!
隨便吧,反正她給了我一支超強的體香劑。看!沒有黃色的污漬了。來,聞聞我腋下。

-- No, I'm...
不,我...

-- Dude, come on smell them!
來吧,快聞一下。

-- I don't wanna smell your...
我不想聞你的...

-- Smell my damn pits!
見鬼,聞我的腋下!

-- Oh! Actually smells pretty good!
咦,不錯。

-- Yes, see? Oh, dude, check this out, I'm gonna use the same?awesome to get this girl that I used to get my last girlfriend.
是吧?看,我要用把前女友的方法去把這個妹。

-- Dude she's hot!
她是個辣妹!

-- Come on man!
來吧

Rule #3: Use your secret weapon.
守則3:出動秘密武器

-- Hey girl, what's...
嘿,小姐。

-- Run!!!!
快跑!

Lesson learned, make sure it's not a man.
上了一課,就是要確定那不是個男的。

-- You know you still haven't...
其實你還是沒...

-- Okey, I know I haven't. You're just dwelling off my game! You want me to get a girl? Huh?
你老是破壞我的好事。你要我把妹給你看嗎?

-- All right, I'll do it, watch!
好,我現(xiàn)在就去,看著吧

Rule #4: Don't limit your options.
守則4:不要限制你的選擇

-- Just, please go out with me?
跟我約會吧!

-- No.
不。

-- Please?
拜托

-- No!
不。

-- I could get you another strawberry cheese cake, I could get like, five!
我可以多給你一個草莓起司蛋糕。我可以給你5個。

-- No!!!
不!??!

Lesson learned, women eat food.
上了一課,就是女生是吃食物的。

-- Come on, I have some really good...
拜托啦,我很棒的。

-- I'm never gonna get any girls !
我永遠(yuǎn)也不可能有女朋友了!

-- Oh~ you poor baby.
噢,可憐的小寶貝。

-- What? Why? What the hell are you doing?
什么?!為什么!你在干什么?!

-- This poor boy was crying, and then I, I gave him my phone number?to see if?he wanted to talk about his feelings later.
這可憐的小寶貝在哭,所以我把我的電話號碼給他了??此龝合氩幌雰A訴一下。

Send this video to a friend who can't get a girlfriend, or boyfriend.
把這段影片給沒有女友的朋友看,或沒有男友的朋友。

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