Clerk in a post office, after weighing the letter: 'That letter's too heavy. You'll have to put another stamp on it.' Man: 'What's the good of that? If I put another stamp on it, that will only make it heavier, won't it?' 'What are you doing, my dear?' said a mother to her four-year-old daughter. 'I'm writing a letter to Helen,' the little girl answered. 'But dear,' said the mother, 'you don't know how to write.' The little girl continued to make marks on the paper with her pencil and answered: 'Well, Helen doesn't know how to read, so it doesn't make any difference.' A school inspector was visiting an English class one day. He found some students were not sure about how to put the letters i or e in the words like receive, believe, and ceiling. He said: 'Students, I can give you a rule. It always works well for me.' The students were very interested. Even the teacher seemed eager to learn this important rule. The inspector continued: 'It is simply this: Write the i and the e exactly alike and then put the dot in the middle over them.'